Monday, December 22, 2008

The opening of Sephora

I am absolutely happy.

2 years ago when I was in France, I fell in love with Sephora. They are huge, it is like a make-up boutique except that it's bigger than any make-up stores I've seen. They have rows and rows of everything instead of a few shelves. Wonderful colours, shimmery powders and just shiny stuff.

Then word came that they were going to open here in Singapore. I finally saw it at Taka. today. The interior design follows closely to the stores I saw in France, black counters and shelves. I didn't have a chance to go in because my parents will not take very well to waiting around while I inspect each and everything in wide-eye amazement.

Ok I cannot wait...I simply must find an opportunity to hang around there.

I cannot believe it.. Sephora is here..the departmental store for make-up..truly, I don't think it has ever been done yet!

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Non-inclusiveness in the global world

I just saw Gan's post on how some people would put something on platforms such as FB and MSN and yet be cryptic, shrug and say that they don't want to talk about it. I supposed she might have been referring to me in that entry.

Ah..JY and I ignored her question on FB and I shrugged and didn't want to explain last night. JY did the honours because I have just finished telling Lun about David's tragedy a day ago and I didn't want to talk about it anymore.

In fact telling Lun about it resulted in us both feeling very sad and I had to shut some part of myself so that I could relate the incident in a cold, clinical and detached way so as not to lose control in the Japanese restaurant.

I didn't think I would be able to have that much control to relate it again.

So why did JY and I use FB then. She wasn't on MSN that time. We did call each other to see what each other had but it got too difficult. Talking about it was hard, silence on the phone was equally unbearable when it feels as though we should say something and each had nothing to say. Hanging up on each other wasn't an option either when closure should always be gently introduced.

Maybe FB was right because it provided us with a platform where we could communicate with each other and yet not have to face each other directly. I don't think it was our top priority to announce to 400-over people that something was going on. Besides how do you explain death and pain like that without demeaning the tragedy itself?

Ah yes..perhaps most would think that because posting things on public platforms are not private, they should be inclusive.

But you can no more include the world than you can exclude yourself.

Sadness and grief has always been something private. We put on smiles for the world even if we feel our heart burdened with many a failings, many a regret, many a sadness.

Maybe questions aren't replied because not everything has to be inclusive and sadness isn't for everybody.

A tribute to Eva Cassidy

I just came back from Jazz @ Southbridge. One of the songs that the singer Alemay sang was "Autumn Leaves". I guess after hearing Eva Cassidy's rendition of the song, nothing could beat it, not even the original French version.

I came back and re-watched her Youtube videos. Still as touching as I remembered. I must have watched and listened to her countless times. I didn't think she would still be able to move me so.

Eva Cassidy has been dead for more than 10 years. Yet she is remembered fondly through the sincerity she expressed in her songs. She has also been gaining fans for didn't I stumble upon her and fell in love with her songs before I read up about her and realised that she wasn't around any more. Her songs seemed even more precious and poignant to me then. One timeless voice.

A lot of the comments left by people say that God must have wanted her to join the angels above, for her work here was done...how she lived inside her song. I know what that latter comment meant.

With most songs the songs is part of the singer, the songs never appear bigger than the singer themselves but with Eva Cassidy, her songs always feels like they are so much more than her as if they transcend almost everything, even Eva Cassidy herself.

In the wee hours of the morning, listening to her rendition of "Danny Boy" makes me feel a lot:

Oh Danny Boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling
From glen to glen, and down the mountainside.
The summer's gone, and all the roses (are) falling.
'Tis you, 'tis you must go and I must bide.


But come ye back when summer's in the meadow
Or when the valley's hushed and white with snow,
'Tis I'll be here in sunshine or in shadow.
Oh Danny Boy, Oh Danny Boy, I love you so.

But if you come and all the flow'rs are dying
And I am dead, as dead I well may be,
You'll come and find the place where I am lying
And kneel and say an
Ave there for me.

And I shall hear, though soft ye tread above me
And then my grave will warmer, sweeter be,
For you will bend and tell me that you love me,
And I shall sleep in peace until you come to me.



Alternative lyrics for last two lines:

And you'll not fail to tell me that you love me,
I'll simply sleep in peace until you come to me.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Who and what determines who lives and dies?

I just came back from Rin's wedding in Sitiawan.

She fetched us to the bus station this morning. On the way there, she received a phone call regarding an accident. I was a bit taken aback by the questions she asked upon receiving the call, such as if the was bus badly mangled up, how many people died?

One of the guests had taken the bus last night. At the bus station, they were frantically calling around for news. When they got news that the accident did seem serious; the bus had collided with a tree, in my head I was envisioning a shattered windscreen, not a mangled metal mess of a bus.



The parents called when I was almost reaching the checkpoint. News had finally gotten to Singapore and they were worried that I was on the bus. They said it was bad but they didn't know if there was any Singaporeans involved. When I got back home and saw the pictures on the television, I was shocked.

I kept praying that Rin's friend was ok. I kept praying so hard. It simply never occurred to me that it would be that serious. The fates couldn't be that cruel. How could it be? He had just attended a joyous event - a wedding, for heaven's sake. How could it be so ironic, so cruel? It didn't seem right, not right at all....

I went out to buy the papers. I heaved a sigh of relief when the evening Chinese papers did not report his name, neither did the news on the internet. There was still hope, after all, one of the forums I turned up said that the dead were all Malaysians. Then came the 10 p.m news. A chill ran down my spine when the broadcaster reported out a Hongkonger who was a Singapore PR who works in the hospital...I couldn't catch the details, was he dead or were they merely trying to report the Singaporeans who were involved in the accident?

I only know that his name is David, his parents are in Hong Kong and he was on that bus, seated at the back.

I rushed to google for news. As I searched and read one report after another, I was still hoping that Rin's friend wasn't him. There could be another MO on the bus. Rin's friend could be Singaporean whose parents were vacationing in Hong Kong.

He was seated at the back after all, didn't they say that the impact was at the front?

Worried for Rin, I called her Singapore number, her Malaysian number as well as her best friend Xinyi. I also called Shupei. I reached their voice mails.

I swung from envisioning the worst-case scenario to telling myself to be optimistic by trying to tell myself that I am a pessimist. I didn't know if I was feeling worried and morose or calm but silly. Was David's last name Ho? How could it be? He was coming back from a wedding...he was seated at the back.

I slept at 2 a.m. and woke up at 6 a.m. I didn't know why either. I tried looking for news again but nothing turned up. I searched every few minutes while surfing about randomly. I went to sleep and around 10 a.m, JY messaged with a search result. His full name had came out in a HongKong news site.

"David Ho C.S, a Hong Kong resident, was a surgeon who practiced in a hospital in Singapore."What we didn't want to see come pass, did.

He was the only one out of the ten who died, the only one who wasn't a Malaysian. He was only 2 hours away from Singapore.

I don't know him personally but all of us should have came back safely. We had gone there together, we should have came back together too, all of us.

Waves of thoughts, feelings and despair keeps washing over me. But I don't want to contemplate about the fragility of life, even if it keeps threatening to engulf me again like it did before. I don't want to think about the lack of control we have over our lives. Who and what determines who lives and dies? Why is it so ironic, cruel and unfair?

No. Life cannot be that cruel. The dead must be in a better place if they are not here with us.

David, with all my heart, I'm certain that you are in heaven.